Monday, April 21, 2008

Tim Foli was a Wannabe

Have you ever looked up Tim Foli's stats? Take a look here and prepare for an eye-popping waltz through 70s and 80s baseball mediocrity.

Here are a few tidbits:
  • .251 lifetime Batting Average
  • .283 lifetime OBP (ouch!)
  • .309 lifetime Slugging Percentage
  • 25 HRs in over 6,000 career at-bats
There's more, but you've probably lost your lunch already.

I will also add that not only was Tim Foli one of the most offensively challenged players to ever grace a major league diamond, he also sported an insufferably bad mustache. So bad, in fact, that a major league survey showed an astounding 93.67% of players would want to hang out with Tim Foli in a bar. The primary reason given? They thought it would drive more woman toward them because, "next to Tim's 'stache, anyone will look good."

Please be warned that these pictures are not for the faint of heart, those suffering from hypothermia, infants, older women, or Estonians.

You have been warned!

Ladies and gentlemen, I know Keith Hernandez, and you Tim Foli, are no Keith Hernandez!

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